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Couples Counseling for Clutter -May 2024 Newsletter

I often hear clients lament: “The problem is him/her/them…”


I know, I get it!  I have one of those.  Here are some quick and easy problem/solution ideas to seemingly intractable situations.


1.      You, calling from the other room: “Oh Honey, I moved the laundry basket to the bathroom so it will be easier for you to put your clothes in there.”  For the one who drops their dirty clothes in other places. 

2.     Where are my keys?” “Oh, guess what?  I hung up this hook by the door for our keys so we will no longer have to worry where they are.  Just hang them right here!”

3.     “He/she/they hold on to everything!  One of their parents died and we have all of these boxes.”  This is a very common theme among the sandwich generation and beyond (adults caring for their parents while still caring for their children).


Try this: “I know sentimental items are hard to let go of.  I am concerned that those boxes in the (basement, attic, etc.) will get moldy and ruin the items and papers inside.  Can we take some time this weekend and review what’s in there?  Then we can sort the items into keep, donate and discard, and put them in a clear plastic bin where they won’t get moldy (this is the only time I recommend plastic!)


4.     Or another common complaint: “They won’t get rid of any books!” Try this!  “Hey, could we make a plan around books?  What if each time we buy a new book, we look through our books and give one away?  This way someone else gets to enjoy our books.”

5.     Appliances on the kitchen counter: “How about if we just move this bread maker/smoothie maker/waffle grill, into this upper cabinet and if we still haven’t used it in a year, we can give it away to someone who will love it and use it?”


Basically, whatever area of your home that causes you stress because of clutter – come up with a solution then suggest your idea to your partner/roommate/child!


Just like you need empathy from them, they need empathy and understanding from you.  Some people didn’t learn how to part with things, so these things are harder.  Some people didn’t grow up learning how to pare down and organize.  Creating new habits and systems is an awesome way to get both of your needs met.


And if you need some consulting/coaching give me a call -  we can make a plan!

Love, Rebecca

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May 07
Rated 5 out of 5 stars.

fantastic as always Victoria Brooklyn Heights

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